Your pain is the breaking of the shell that encloses your understanding.
-Kahlil Gibran
I had my second training session this Sunday. I decided I could go a little faster, push myself a little harder, and I took a third of the stairs two at a time. By the time I got to the top, I was close to throwing up. My legs shaky, my mind numb from the pain.
I pushed through it and tried to run through the breaks from the stairs. I tried to run after the stairs. I could not. Those first two at a time taken stairs had left their indelible mark.
I was not strong enough.
How am I going to run this race without making a fool of myself when I can't even take one flight of the 672-odd steps fast?
The answer to this question is a lesson I have never learned and is crucial for the next phase of my life: to grow naturally a little at a time. A seed does not bear fruit the first day it is planted. Likewise, I will not be strong enough to run all of the Dipsea stairs the second time I train. I will get stronger a little at a time. Naturally.
I had this epiphany a few days later. And, while I am more committed to this race than ever, I am scared. But in that fear of pain, of growing, of trusting myself and my body, of trusting the process of all life and growth, there is great wisdom to be had. I know I am growing in more ways than just physically, through the pain of exertion, I know that I am growing in understanding.
PS--On a much funner note, Yo is having a very fun giveaway! Check it out!
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2 comments:
you ARE strong enough. but, lady, you can't sprint up stairs your first times out! you'll get discouraged.
don't be discouraged. take the stairs one at a time. check your pulse. pace yourself. PACE yourself =)
yaayyy!! another entry into the contest! i'm so excited for the contest. SO excited.
my word verification is "bakfil".
Yes, one step at a time. You can do it--but it small increments you'll get there! (Getting old is harsh, I agree.)
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